Womanly Woes

I’m annoyed at the sheer number of articles churned out that portray modern women as these super-responsible beings who have to make CHOICES left right and centre that decide the fate of the kids, their men and the universe in general.

These articles are usually written very prescriptively and tend to pit one kind of woman against the other, on issues which are elevated to a degree of importance that veers on the ridiculous. These (predictably) include working/stay-at-home-moms, breast/bottle feeding, ‘natural’/C-section births-and a host of other (what I believe) are polarising (but ultimately pointless) topics. Or they are written lauding the success of a prominent woman as a group victory. All the women identify as ‘feminists’, obviously -but of wildly differing stripes.

Ever seen an article written for men that urges them to reflect on the relatively innocuous  choices they make in their lives, and goads them to analyse and modify it to suit an something-ist agenda? Reading some articles written by women , for women can quickly leave your head aching.

What these ‘feminist’ articles do is scrutinise, analyse and pass judgement on various individual choices. Years and reams of such writing very subtly create real self-doubt in many women who second-guess their own decisions and obsess over whether they are doing the right thing for themselves/their men/their family…with no end in sight.

I’d rather women learn a thing or two from men, stop agonising over choices that are essentially personal and just get on with it. P.S The world will not end even if you make the ‘wrong’ choice.

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I personally abhor thinking in collectivist terms, and prefer to embrace the cult of the individual. My problem with feminism and with any other “-isms” in general is that they begin to believe that their ’cause’ is greater than the individual. I prefer to remain a free agent, unlabelled and unboxed, and identify with a group as and when I choose to.

This is not to say that I’m “against” women’s rights or anything.This blog is my testimony. I do believe that an gender-equal society in many parts of the planet is worth fighting for  but I also believe that the process to ensure equal rights exists as a continuum, which began with racial equality, but has progressed to include equality for women, the LGBT community and socio-economic equality.

Call me jaded, but I’m sick of the men v/s women trope as well. Yes, there’s evolutionary biology and various other branches of science that focus on the differences between men and women, but I’d like to think that they are quite similar in many ways – with any inherent differences magnified and exacerbated by society, to a point where people claim that man and woman are from different planets.

I’ve heard the term ‘equal but different’ bandied about, but in my own life I go by ‘equal and not-all-that-different’. Life may teach me differently, but I’d like to start out with this hypothesis and be proven wrong than vice versa!

 

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